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Thursday, December 28, 2006
>>>

overview of malaysia trip :

well, i can't say that it wasn't fun at all, but i can't completely catergorise it as fun, for the fact that i would have no more face to go back to kai wei's house as i had done something to obstruct the sewage system in the toilet bowl. HAHA... EMBARRASSING. i won't say what it is though, it's only known to besties.

this 5 day trip had been successful in lightening my emotional load and trauma i had suffered these past few days. i'm happy that it's getting easier each day to accept reality.

but i'm still deeply hurt. heavily wounded.

on the way to Kai wei's grandma's house, it's a 2 hour journey. i guess it's because of late-night chats on msn with patrick and other people, my shortened night-rest was taking its toll on me. HEADACHE and STOMACH UPSETS reigns my whole being. i'm sick. slept at 2.30am and woke up at 7am the other morning.

a throbbing headache persists.

it's pretty clear cut that headache takes a little visit to me it's because of you.

THINKING OF YOU MAKES MY WHOLE WORLD GO TOPSY TURVY.

i miss you alot there, but there's no reception. too bad. hope you understand. was hoping that you 'd miss me too.

last day, my grandfather took me out for breakfast. i didn't have the appetite to eat it, however, i just had the urge to spend a little more time with him. thus i agreed to go for breakfast despite my poor appetite. i was super touched that after so long, we finally have a chance for grand father-daughter quality time.

he stirred my drink for me, i suddenly felt a heartwarming gush of emotions surge through me. i cried at that simple yet touching gesture showing subtle hints of love and concern.

awww........ i love him so. though we didnt' even exchange conversation for more than 10 times from his house till singapore.

KINSHIP, VERY IMPORTANT.

i returned home these few days, i heard my brothers laugh at some things, i was wondering what were they laughing at. i asked them. they shared the humour.

finally i realised what i'm lacking : quality time with my family.

i'd been outside all the time, ever since my return from china. barely spending my night in my humble domain, where my comfort zone lies. no wonder i feel so insecure whenever i'm out or with strangers i knew for not even 10 years.

maybe i got to leave you.


{ go to hell } 12:47 AM

!about me

name:apple mei


wishlist
birthday's on 21st oct..thanks people..*smirks*

l.MP3--at least 4gb and no CREATIVE please

2.a brand new wardrobe( packed with new clothes)

3.wait till i think of stuff

lastly, a stupid idiot 24 hours available for me...


!archives

February 2006;
March 2006;
April 2006;
May 2006;
June 2006;
July 2006;
August 2006;
September 2006;
October 2006;
November 2006;
December 2006;
January 2007;
February 2007;
March 2007;
April 2007;
June 2007;
July 2007;
August 2007;
September 2007;
October 2007;



Free Site Counter
!bitchin'



!connections


martin di di (cutest guy on earth
alvin
anthony
-
arisa
ashika
Brenda
cai ying
charmaine
chen wei
couz yee teng
Currina
debbie
deline
dinah
elvis
GERMS
ginny
han tiong
jaclyn
jamie rea
jessica
kai ngee
kiara
kin yew
nicholas lee
nigel
noozlie
roshilah
sann
sarah
Seng kang
sharon
suhailah
thiam chye
w- pretty wan cheng
yong cai
yu jin
zhi qiang
zhi xiang
zhu wen
!credits

i live in my lackadaisical world i call my own
but only to be tied down by shackles of education which obviously suck big time
living with complexities of life which cannot be revealed and told openly
living in self denial and drowned in my everyday lies
unhealthy living dead i call myself
i just want a simple life with a boyfriend
the desire for a simple want purely makes my life difficult to those who knows my secret
with that i rather live life a living dead.
i no longer reveal the zany side of me
maybe i lost it along the way
on my pilgrimage to maturity
i yearn for someone to open the door
one of where i came from
to find bliss once again
out in the open lawn