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Saturday, September 08, 2007
>>>

life has been quite smooth sailing, but i hate to come across even minor disputes of which, unfortunately, am going through every other day. it would affect my social life of course, but i'm deeply depressed that the one, whom i depend on so much, is actually the one loading me with all these shit i'm going through everyday. my mood is totally dampened with the sight of you. TOTALLY.

so i've been working throughout the whole of my weekends. met weiloong on 8 sept.
he is still so cute :) his charisma, aura, charm has been preserved so well.
i'm totally smitten. as much as i want to hug him for one last time, it just didn't feel right. he seems to have something on and kai wei and jing scared him off maybe.

i couldnt think of any reasons to make him stay as much as i want to. after we said bye, i regretted. that i didnt speak enough, that i didn't express my actual feelings right there, that i made him feel uncomfortable, that maybe i wasn't whoever he knew anymore. maybe we have changed, but maybe there's some things about him that i still love alot. it dosen't matter to me that he's a little rounder, cause i've expected it. i know he loves all the unhealthy food, he loves to eat. but all these flaws just seemed all right to me. really. it does. he smokes, i hate smokers. but just when i thought how he used to blow it away from my face, i want to be around whenever he lights his cigarette, because i want to feel the sweetness of his action and consideration toward me. he may not be the best boyfriend in the world, but nevertheless, he never realised how his little little details he cared to notice, how meticulous he was, have impacted upon me even until now, i appreciated it so much and so love him for that. i think every other guy should look up to him. he has become a benchmark for my choice over any potential guys.

too bad, so sad.
and that night, as we said goodbye, i kept turning back, hoping to see him another time. but he wasnt anywhere near, atleast, he wasnt visible within my range.
i've got to learn how to let go.

eating at the wanton noodle shop in heeren :)

taking some pics to DESTRESS myself..

even more pictures...

and more....


{ go to hell } 10:53 PM

!about me

name:apple mei


wishlist
birthday's on 21st oct..thanks people..*smirks*

l.MP3--at least 4gb and no CREATIVE please

2.a brand new wardrobe( packed with new clothes)

3.wait till i think of stuff

lastly, a stupid idiot 24 hours available for me...


!archives

February 2006;
March 2006;
April 2006;
May 2006;
June 2006;
July 2006;
August 2006;
September 2006;
October 2006;
November 2006;
December 2006;
January 2007;
February 2007;
March 2007;
April 2007;
June 2007;
July 2007;
August 2007;
September 2007;
October 2007;



Free Site Counter
!bitchin'



!connections


martin di di (cutest guy on earth
alvin
anthony
-
arisa
ashika
Brenda
cai ying
charmaine
chen wei
couz yee teng
Currina
debbie
deline
dinah
elvis
GERMS
ginny
han tiong
jaclyn
jamie rea
jessica
kai ngee
kiara
kin yew
nicholas lee
nigel
noozlie
roshilah
sann
sarah
Seng kang
sharon
suhailah
thiam chye
w- pretty wan cheng
yong cai
yu jin
zhi qiang
zhi xiang
zhu wen
!credits

i live in my lackadaisical world i call my own
but only to be tied down by shackles of education which obviously suck big time
living with complexities of life which cannot be revealed and told openly
living in self denial and drowned in my everyday lies
unhealthy living dead i call myself
i just want a simple life with a boyfriend
the desire for a simple want purely makes my life difficult to those who knows my secret
with that i rather live life a living dead.
i no longer reveal the zany side of me
maybe i lost it along the way
on my pilgrimage to maturity
i yearn for someone to open the door
one of where i came from
to find bliss once again
out in the open lawn